Repost from @kimberlytolife:
Meet Cesar, a child of life, his own man. He belongs to no one but himself. He has adults in his world that are responsible for him and his wellbeing, that guide him and teach him by example. But he leads and directs his own life. Cesar is empowered.
He is never suppressed, he is never told to do something or behave in a certain way unless there is a reason, and that reason is understood by him, so that in the end he acts out of understanding and not because he was told or commanded by an authority. Cesar is learning how to become his own self-authority.
This takes time and patience on the part of the adult. It tests and pushes the adult to understand for themselves why they expect certain behaviours, and it challenges the adult to look at their own beliefs, ideas and perceptions. It challenges the adult’s own conditioning.
In this way, Cesar is a mirror, and thus a great teacher. He also sometimes finds solutions and understandings more directly than adults in his world. Cesar is being raised in a community, he is our teacher as much as we are his. Obviously we intervene, explain and guide more, but are also open to what he has to present to us, to do our own introspection and not shut him down because he is only a child. In this way, we are equals according to our abilities.
#unschooling #homeschool #homeschooling #childsupport #children #child #unlearnandrelearn #parenting #alternativeparent #desteni #communityliving #principledliving #communityprinciples #selfauthority #equality #childrensrights #wildschooling #consciousparenting #parentingforlife
![Cesar gave Syntia his train tracks about a year ago, and before they were hers, she would play with them together with Cesar. She's had a ton of time to learn the different pieces, how to put them together and build a track, but for some reason, she DID NOT want to build a track by herself and most of all preferred to just watch as someone else built the track for her.
Lj and I knew she was perfectly capable of building a track for herself and we tried to support her to start small and show herself that she can do it. Or that we'd be here if she gets stuck, but she can at least try on her own. Any such attempts, however, were met with an absolute and firm refusal. So, we did it with her, or for her.
We started wondering, is this little girl really just taking advantage of us at this point? Are we entertaining this too much? Should we push harder? We knew she could do it, she knew she could do it, but for some reason she just didn't want to do it, at least, not yet.
And then one day, out of the blue, she takes out her blocks and starts building a track... by herself. Lj quietly waived me over, pointing at her, then signing 'shhht', lol - didn't want to disturb the moment. The track you see in the pic is the first one she built by herself. It wasn't a "beginner's" track like a simple circle or a straight line, it was a more intricate design laid out exactly and precisely how she wanted it to be, including all the elements she wanted to have as a part of it. Kabam, out of the blue.
There are other things where Syntia 'took her sweet time', like learning how to walk and potty training, where it was clear at some point that she was able to do it, but for some reason, pulled back or didn't want to do it all by herself just yet. It's so easy as parents to freak out over that, to think that children should develop skills in a particular way, like 'starting small' or doing something by yourself as soon as you're able to. But not all kids are the same in this. [Continued in comments..]](https://scontent-sea1-1.cdninstagram.com/v/t51.29350-15/135216034_868657797266702_107582540258970761_n.jpg?_nc_cat=105&ccb=1-7&_nc_sid=8ae9d6&_nc_ohc=5qvWorAaQU0AX_Qrjn2&_nc_ht=scontent-sea1-1.cdninstagram.com&edm=ANo9K5cEAAAA&oh=00_AfBfLnLqnc_Rg3uprr_1ex9XhutQf0kt2ieu89_7Lu9oxA&oe=64803712)
